Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Weigh to go...

Now the weights are in and the targets agreed, we have begun our discussions about prizes. The two suggestions so far are:

"Losers baby sit the winners kids (or cats) for a weekend??" - From Doogie Tuesday, and

"Loser's wife (or girlfriend) gives winner a bl*wjob - obviously!" - From Dr. Rob.

Neither of these really appeal to me for varying reasons. Taking Doogie's suggestion - you cannot compare looking after 3 or 4 children to looking after 2 kittens, add to this that it is a boring suggestion from someone under 40 who seems to be approaching old age and you'll agree that we can ignore this idea.

Now, taking Dr. Rob's suggestion - a) Jayne / Laure / Lena will not agree to this, b) They probably do it differently in France / Russia, c) If this is the 'prize' do you think we could talk Dad into taking part????, d) it's just wrong.

With the crapness of Doogie's suggestion and the inappropriateness of Dr. Rob's suggestion, I have a few ideas of my own:

1. Losers have colonic irrigation to assist with their final goal; and or,
2. Losers have full body wax to assist with their final goal.

If any of our followers (only one so far) have some more ideas, please let us know....


  1. (a) have you bothered to ask Jayne? check it out.
    (b) indeed, but doesn't that make it more intriguing?
    c) Dad, almost certainly, but can't you see a teeny, weeny flaw in that plan?
    (d) I think you're being overly moral here. Take a leaf from "Premiership Jen's" book:

    Paying a girl to have sex with you is one thing," she explained, when asked why she'd declined Wayne's invitation for a home visit. "Paying a girl to come back to your marital home when your pregnant missus is out is taking it a step too far."

    So, just so long as the loser's bird is not up the duff, should be fine! Though I do understand that you would prefer colonic irrigation to a blow job - whatever floats your boat, I suppose.

  2. Since you're all of scotish stock and thus have complexions of a grey november morning, I suggest a St Tropez spray tan.

  3. I like this idea Dan, but feel it could be taken a step further.

    Maybe a St Tropez spray tan with a difference, with a stencilled 'FATTY' on the back similar to the naming on a football shirt - quite easily done with some self adhesive letters...